Post by Deleted on Jul 8, 2020 2:53:22 GMT -6
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[/div][attr="class","appHEADER"]Hawthornsnake
[attr="class","appTAG"]@/hawthorn - (long-haired, reddish-brown ticked tabby w. startling golden eyes)
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| 46 MOONS | molly | heterosexual | riverclan | deputy |
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[attr="class","appCATEGORY"]TRAITS
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| + determined + observant + confident + hard-working + reliable | - stubborn - short-tempered - outspoken - reserved - insensitive |
[attr="class","appCATEGORY"]PERSONALITY
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[attr="class","appFIELD"]there is a determination inside of hawthornsnake that leaves most on edge. she is not one to easily give in because the task is difficult, a trait some admire. she is determined to protect her clan, whatever the cost and can be a bit stubborn when it comes to certain situations. that is the only downfall to hawthornsnake determination — her stubbornness. once her mind is made up there is no going back, no matter how much it may hurt others — or herself — in the long run.
she may not look it, but she is a wild thing. she speaks her mind even if her opinions are not the most welcome, and disregards the consequences of doing so. she dislikes biting her tongue for anyone, even to those older than herself. she holds the utmost respect for them, yet she feels as though speaking her mind on matters of importance is her best option rather than sitting on the sidelines and letting things go to hell. she has always been like this, yet it seems her passion behind her beliefs has only grown stronger.
she is not one to share her personal life or feelings with others, which leads her to be a very distant molly. she does not like to get close to others for the fear that she will get hurt in the long run. she dislikes portraying weakness, which is why she has become such a reserved cat over the moons. she is slow to reveal her emotions to others. it is a weakness as well as a strength, for those who deem to destroy her will never know what she is truly feeling in order to use it against her. yet those who attempt to get close to her will be stuck in the same predicament.
she has always been observant. observing one from afar can tell you a lot more about them than speaking with them directly can ever do. she catches the small things, the things she knows no one else attempts to notice, and uses it to her advantage when and if the opportunity arises.
the most dangerous element of hawthornsnake is her short fuse. one does not have to be close to her to know that she is an aggressive cat. one glance says it all. maybe she has the look, who knows, but most do their best to stay on her good side. when angered, there is no doubt that she is a force to be reckoned with — an incident from her past can attest to this. she dislikes being wronged in any way, shape, or form, and the full brunt of her wrath will crash down like a wave upon those who do.
she may not look it, but she is a wild thing. she speaks her mind even if her opinions are not the most welcome, and disregards the consequences of doing so. she dislikes biting her tongue for anyone, even to those older than herself. she holds the utmost respect for them, yet she feels as though speaking her mind on matters of importance is her best option rather than sitting on the sidelines and letting things go to hell. she has always been like this, yet it seems her passion behind her beliefs has only grown stronger.
she is not one to share her personal life or feelings with others, which leads her to be a very distant molly. she does not like to get close to others for the fear that she will get hurt in the long run. she dislikes portraying weakness, which is why she has become such a reserved cat over the moons. she is slow to reveal her emotions to others. it is a weakness as well as a strength, for those who deem to destroy her will never know what she is truly feeling in order to use it against her. yet those who attempt to get close to her will be stuck in the same predicament.
she has always been observant. observing one from afar can tell you a lot more about them than speaking with them directly can ever do. she catches the small things, the things she knows no one else attempts to notice, and uses it to her advantage when and if the opportunity arises.
the most dangerous element of hawthornsnake is her short fuse. one does not have to be close to her to know that she is an aggressive cat. one glance says it all. maybe she has the look, who knows, but most do their best to stay on her good side. when angered, there is no doubt that she is a force to be reckoned with — an incident from her past can attest to this. she dislikes being wronged in any way, shape, or form, and the full brunt of her wrath will crash down like a wave upon those who do.
[attr="class","appCATEGORY"]HISTORY
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[attr="class","appFIELD"]your mother had been nervous when she'd told her mate of her pregnancy. she'd known deep down that he loved her, yet she'd been too damaged from her past to even hope for a positive reaction at her news.
but it was positive.
your mother birthed her first litter of kits, brought the light of their lives into the world: a lilac ticked tabby she-kit, a solid chocolate tom kit, and a solid fawn she-kit — brinekit, buzzardkit, and daisykit, respectively. they were the perfect family, everyone'd said so... and then you and your littermates had to come along and ruin everything.
you fail when you attempt to put what had happened between your mother and step-father into words because... well, because you just didn't know. you'd had no clue what had driven your mother into your father's paws — his charisma, perhaps? — but whatever it was had resulted in three illegitimate kits to be born. you and your littermates had caused a lot of trouble on your birthing day — it had been difficult for your mother, nearly cost her her life. not only that, but it had halted your elder siblings warrior ceremonies by a day. the screeching from the nursery had caused adderclaw, your mother's best friend, to feth the medicine cat — something was terribly wrong.
you emerged feet first — no one can explain how — and it had become a race against time to get you out of your mother's womb before before you suffocated. beaverclaw — who thought he'd fathered this litter as well — had been pacing in front of the nursery in a panic, desperate to know what was going on. between keeping him out of the nursery and urging the medicine cat to work faster, adderclaw had practically been losing her mind. on your mother's final push to send you into this world, you'd been silent. your mother, weak from exhaustion, could barely lift her head so that she could help you. adderclaw took it upon herself to groom you, her movements harsh and feverish as she did everything in her power to make you cry...
and you'd screamed, yowled to the high heavens as you writhed underneath adderclaw's harsh tongue. you'd shown who you would be early on, a feisty little devil who was not to be toyed with. you most definitely were the largest of the litter, certainly the most violent. you would come to believe that everything could be settled with tooth and claw, attack first and ask questions later would become your motto. you would become outspoken, always the one who demanded their voice to be heard, and wouldn't be above putting others down with your harsh words and sharp tongue. kind words would be reserved for kin and no one else.
your littermates entered the world far easier than yourself, pheasantkit being the second. everyone expected her to grow out of her shell as she got older, yet she would prove them wrong by remaining this shy little thing. she was practically attached at the hip to one of her littermates at all times — they were her anchors, her safety net. she wouldn't be able to cope without them as they became apprentices, wouldn't be able to handle the pressure of not being good enough for her mentor. in an effort to prove herself, this little life would be cut short.
rook-kit came into the world screeching in such a high voice. everyone knew who he would become right away — the life of the party. he would be overtly charismatic, convincing others to do his bidding while he lay back and watched events unfold. he was the culprit behind a lot of drama that went on within the clan — he made life fun.
batkit came into the world much like his brother, screaming his lungs out and batting at everything in his way. he was a fierce little thing whose bite would become just as painful as his words. passionate. aggressive. blunt. he would be loyal to a fault, would fight as though his life depended on it, and would love just as fiercely.
dimstar herself only allowed a select few to visit your mother and her newborns — the medicine cat, adderclaw, and your birth father among them. this factor alone led to the unavoidable hell that would be let loose upon the clan.
your fierce nature didn't die down one second that you were out of your mother's belly. you demanded the best spot while feeding, shoving your littermates out of the way and whining to your mother when they didn't move. you developed quicker than them, for your eyes opened up much earlier than your littermates. you were a unique case, determined to get the best out of life early on. dimstar lifted her rule on visiting the nursery after three days — she'd figured your mother had finally regained her full strength. you believe she'd only allowed spiderfang to visit because, intuitive as she was, she knew he had been the true father and that when the truth would come out, everything would go to hell.
you doubt she knew how dark the situation would turn, how quickly everything would fall apart, until it happened directly before her very eyes.
days after dimstar had lifted her rule, beaverclaw popped in for a visit... and regretted it dearly. he'd gazed down at the newest additiont to his family, at the kits that looked nothing like him, and he knew. you barely remember their conversation — great starclan, you were so young — and yet you remember them arguing, remember your mother yowling beaverclaw's name as he raced out of the nursery in search of spiderfang.
a fight ensued between the two toms and the warmth of your mother left you and your littermates as she raced out of the nursery in an attempt to stop the fight. in the blink of an eyes, with the mere flash of claws and fangs, both toms had sustained life-threatening injuries and bled to death in the middle of the camp, your mother yowling their names, cursing herself for the tragedy she had caused... and the anger she had brought down upon us.
you weren't the sweetest kit in the nursery. out of your littermates, you had to have been the most troublesome of them all. you would often pick fights with many of the older kits at the ripe age of two moons. you would win, but that never stopped you. if you could take them down with your tiny paws and needle-sharp teeth, you would use your words to tear down the walls of confidence they'd built to protect themselves. you were the bully of the bunch — those that weren't family were your enemies.
your brothers weren't exactly the gentlemanly sort of kits, either. you never really got along with the other kits — your rough play ran them off to their mothers and you were all cut off from the other kits of the nursery. your mother had no idea how to control you, did everything in her power to change your cruel ways, but nothing worked. trouble seemed to follow you no matter where you went — the nursery had been no exception.
your mother's affair with your father was no secret. at the age of five moons, one kit took it upon herself to open her big fat trout mouth about the situation, bringing up the memories of his death and who had killed him. "where's your father, hawthornkit?" it was a taunt, a jab at you because she knew exactly where your father was. you hated her for that question, hated that she could tease you about losing your father so easily, and took your anger out on her.
harsh words were your forte, more or less, but a fight between yourself and that kit had been bound to happen. you pounced on her without taking into regard the consequences that would follow... or not. once the fight had been broken up, you were rather surprised dimstar had not pushed your apprentice ceremony back a moon. she did, however, tell you that if another incident like that happened again, she would push your apprentice ceremony back indefinitely. that was enough to push you into ignoring whatever the other kits said.
perhaps that was when your mother realized she could never control you. in your heart, your blamed her for everything bad that had happened in your short life... and everything that had yet to come.
the transition from kit to apprentice came naturally. you were already a cocky little shit, thought you knew everything there was to know — auburnflame deemed you were in for a rude awakening. she was training you to become the best of the best, and that's exactly what you became. when you finally did find time for yourself, you were never really alone. between pheasantpaw and auburnflame, you were always busy.
two moons in, while out training with auburnflame, you'd slipped away from her when she wasn't looking. you allowed your paws to guide you, taking you to a place your mentor had yet to bring you — the thunderclan border. the scent that hit you was strong, caused you to stop dead in your tracks. it was here you met bitternpaw, a large spotted tom with eyes the color of emeralds.
the two of you were hostile on the spot but, after a couple of heartbeats, the tension disappeared to be replaced with curiosity. the two of you began to talk about anything... everything... until auburnflame stumbled upon you. she pulled you away from the border and scolded you for entertaining the thunderclan apprentice. you were to care for the elders until further notice, but you didn't mind too much — the elders were avid storytellers and most were welcoming.
you couldn't get the handsome thunderclan apprentice out of your head, though... and so you met again. and again. and again. you were falling hard for the spotted tom with fire in his eyes.
and then his sister, burnetpaw, sent your world spinning.
she stumbled upon the two of you, so closely wrapped around one another that she couldn't tell where her brother ended and his love began. and when she finally could decipher one from the other, she grabbed hold of bitternpaw's tail and yanked him away from you. not one to be pushed around so easily, you leaped at burnetpaw. the two of you matched one another blow for blow, though it was obvious you would be victorious.
bitternpaw, however, would not stand aside and watch his sister get torn apart by the cat he loved. he stood between the both of you, effectively ending the fight because neither of you wanted to accidentally swipe at bitternpaw, and burnetpaw snarled at you to leave. unwilling to wasted any more time arguing with bitternpaw's hot-headed sister, you turned tail and fled back to camp. this decision, however, did not stop your heart from breaking as bitternpaw called after you in vain.
it was pheasantpaw, rookpaw, and batpaw who stood beside you to pick up the pieces.
it was in your ninth moon that you showed you were a force to be reckoned with. pheasantpaw's mentor, hailfang, was one cat you could definitely admit feeling hatred twoards. pheasantpaw was an excellent hunter, better than yourself, but her skills in combat were piss poor. hailfang would put her down because of this, would tell her she would never amount to much if she couldn't even fight to defend her clan. resisting the urge to claw the tom's eyes out, you often used your alone time to help pheasantpaw improve her battle techniques. but it still wasn't good enough; it was never good enough.
pheasantpaw would often be seen sulking around camp, looking rather dejected and angry at herself after training. you would try to spend time with her in order to lift her spirits, but the once clingy she-cat only pushed you, her closest sibling, away. and despite the love your littermates held for pheasantpaw, they were all secretly relieved that they didn't have to deal with the clingy she-cat any longer. you should've known something was wrong, should've alerted your mother or the medicine cat or someone, but you never thought the issue would escalate to what it did.
you woke one morning to find that pheasantpaw's nest was empty. cold. you alerted your mother right away, who in turn alerted dimstar. she formed a search party for the young molly and, much to your mother's disagreement, you wormed your way into the patrol. pheasantpaw's scent led you to the gorge, but she was no where to be found. they searched high and low but found no sign of the molly — shy, insecure pheasantpaw was gone.
you were too busy wallowing in self guilt to speak on the issue with your mother — that should've been the first sign of the chaos that would ensue. upon entering riverclan camp, you made a beeline for hailfang — this was all his fault. no one was expecting the attack, especially not hailfang himself, and he was taken by surprise as you knocked him off his paws. you were furious; grief stricken. it took your mother, auburnflame and dimstar herself to pull you away from the tom. you screamed to the heavens, cursed the tom's name, all the while being hauled away.
hailfang's wounds weren't fatal, but they were deep — they would most definitely leave scars, reminders that one doesn't wrong you or your family and get away with it.
hailfang steered clear of you after that -- feeling your claws once was all he needed to know how deep your hatred for him ran. the first few days of grieving were tumultuous, lashing out one minute and wailing the next. the only one able to take your mood swings in stride and without question was the one who brought you into this world — your mother.
it was then that any anger you held towards her dissipated.
a moon goes by, and tragedy strikes the clan. a skirmish over sunning rocks results in the death of two well-respected clan mates — the deputy, looncall, and your beloved mother. two major losses in less than two moons — you are uncertain if your heart can take any more loss.
you throw yourself into your training, despite your littermate's worries. you sparred with your fellow den mates, hunted whenever possible, helped around camp... anything to keep your mind off of pheasantpaw and your mother. when you collapsed from exhaustion, that's when everyone realized how largely these deaths affected you.
the leader felt it best for your warrior ceremony to be put on hold until further notice and, for once in your rebellious life, you didn't protest. and two moons later, while your littermates received their warrior names — rookstorm and batfang — you remained an apprentice in order to better your mental health and return to normal. to this day, you are incredibly thankful to auburnflame for not allowing you to wallow in your own guilt and grief for your extra moons as an apprentice.
fourteen moons old and dimstar finally grants you with your warrior name: hawthornsnake. the moons pass peacefully, with you fulfilling you duties like any good warrior. and even though you are quite young, you are a well-respected member of the clan.
six moons later, you fall pregnant. your brothers, overprotective as always, were furious — who on earth had been brazen enough to lay their paws on you? you, on the other paw? you were frightened, really. you knew the tom who had gotten you pregnant (an elder warrior known as daceclaw) would most likely want nothing to do with these kits.
and then she came into the world, loud and kicking. she was the spitting image of her father, with her blue ticked coat. asterkit was to be her name - and you loved her dearly. you had always thought bitternclaw would've been the one to have your heart, but you'd been wrong. gazing down at the little she-kit you had brought into the world, it became quite clear that your heart belonged to her, always and forever.
there was never a dull moment with asterkit around. she marched to her own beat, made her own rules, and was quite content with giving her mother a near heart attack every chance she got. there were numerous visits to yellowstrike* — everything from torn claws to sprained paws. they were such regulars that he would often just shake his head and mutter "not again." when you entered the den.
and then batfang fell under the claws of thunderclan warriors. his death took a toll on you, pushed you into a darker state of mind. having him snatched away from you made you feel utterly alone. but you weren't — rookstorm and asterkit were constant reminders of that.
with their support, you pushed through your grief and enjoyed your time with your daughter before she was apprenticed. and six moons later, when that day came, your eyes shone with pride and joy and you couldn't help but feel that her mentor needed a word of warning — her wild and rambunctious nature was difficult to contain. asterpaw's mentor would have an eventful time with the energetic young molly.
and then everything began to fall apart.
dimstar placed a hot-headed yom known as otterpaw under your wing. you did the best you could as a mentor, the pair of you forging a strong bond right from the start.
everything sort of spiraled after that.
you had never had a close bond with your half-siblings and you looked to change that. with littermates dropping like flies, you were looking to get closer to your estranged half-siblings. and so, with this in mind, you and buzzardwing* ventured out for an evening stroll. it was long before snarls reached the pairs ears and the scent of badger had both cats' fur sticking on end. every cell in your body screamed when you came across the cat against the badger — your half-sister, daisyflower*. she was down but most definitely not out. she was bleeding profusely from a gash in her side, but her teeth were still bared and she swiped at the stinking animal when it neared her — she refused to go down without a fight. a heartbeat was all it took for you to leap into the fray. you were quick on your feet, darting in and landing a few blows before using the strength in your back legs to push yourself away from the animal. buzzardwing, on the other paw, was torn between running for help and staying to protect the she-cats. he chose the latter.
and it cost him his life.
he fought valiantly, but one swipe from the beast was all it took. you heard his spine snap and screamed his name at the top of your lungs, rage and grief coursing through your veins. you knew the odds were against you, but you would not leave daisyflower when there was still breath in your body to fight. you stood protectively in front of daisyflower, who urged you to run while you still could, and snarled a warning at the badger as it ambled closer. you were ready for an attack... but it never came. the large creature turned tail and ran. to this very day, you can not explain why.
draping a wounded daisyflower across your back, you left a motionless buzzardwing behind you. two warriors fetched your half-brother's body and you mourned his loss alongside your half-sister, brinefrost*. shortly after, despite yellowstrike's best efforts, daisyflower succumbed to her wounds. only asterpaw, rookstorm, and yourself remained.
you and rookstorm were as close as two siblings could be, barely leaving one another's side. you drew strength from your littermate and a pawful of warriors found their relationship odd, thinking that the two of you were in love with one another. the mere suggestion made you sick to your stomach — was it so wrong to cling to the only sibling you had left?
but rookstorm began to change and you were the first to notice. he was restless, irritable, and barely spent any time with you. curious and worried, you followed your brother one night — right into twolegplace. he met up with three burly toms. you had no clue what they were discussing, but their quiet murmurs soon turned into a heated argument. rookstorm's shoulders slumped in defeat and he turned his back on the toms, no doubt ready to return to camp... it was the biggest mistake he'd ever made.
the toms jumped rookstorm and you didn't hesitate to break your cover by charging at the nearest tom and dragging him off of your brother. as you went in to drag another off of him, a small blur passed your vision and went crashing into one of the toms — it was otterpaw!
as your apprentice scrapped with one and you scrapped with another, rookstorm was struggling with the one atop him. the next events happened so fast that it became a blur in your mind, but you would never forget it. you had ripped your opponent's throat out and leaped at the tom atop your brother, sending him flying and leaving him stunned. your brother was barely moving, barely breathing, but you had no time to assess his injuries.
otterpaw had become overwhelmed by his opponent and as soon as you raced to aid your apprentice, otterpaw's throat was sliced right before your very eyes. your world crashed around you, losing both your apprentice and brother in one fell swoop. the two toms began to head towards your exhausted and devastated form, but by the grace of starclan a patrol came crashing into the twolegplace.
you spent two moons healing in gorsepelt's* den, despite arguing with marigoldstar about the fact that you were fine. during your healing period, asterpaw became astergrace and you fell into a bout of depression. you blamed yourself for not being quick enough to save two of the most important cats in your life.
four moons later, dimstar succumbed to an unknown illness. the clan was devastated at losing their leader, yet they anticipated lionfire's reign. when the former deputy came back as lionstar, it surprised everyone when she named you as her deputy. the clan was divided between agreeing with her decision or not — you'd been through so much, were you really prepared for such responsibilities?
your daughter became your anchor, giving you the strength you needed to be the best deputy you could be. but she, too, disappeared from your life — vanished in the blink of an eyes. she was searched for, of course, but the evidence only crushed your hopes of finding the young she-cat — streaks of her blood splattered the ground and patches of fur were strewn about. the clan mourned the loss of the young warrior, but you mourned the loss of something far greater...
your heart.
dimstar — riverclan's leader for countless moons. the only leader hawthornsnake knew growing up. named lionfire as her [final] deputy.
yellowstrike — gorsepelt became his apprentice a moon before he was to become a warrior. stepped down from being a medicine cat and returned to regular warrior duties.
gorsepelt — initially began his training to become a warrior. became yellowstrike's apprentice a moon before his warrior ceremony. became medicine cat after yellowstrike stepped down. succumbed to greencough nearly twelve moons ago, leaving sparrowflight as riverclan's medicine cat.
buzzardwing — half-brother of hawthornsnake and her littermates. cared little for them, although did attempt to build a relationship with hawthornsnake shortly before he died.
daisyflower — half-sister of hawthornsnake and her littermates. a kind soul and always offered a smile. indifferent towards her half-siblings; never attempted to build a relationship with any of them.
brinefrost — half-sister of hawthornsnake and her littermates. resting bitch face is her. she is an asshole, absolutely loathes hawthornsnake and blames the molly and her littermates for the tragedy that befell their family.
but it was positive.
your mother birthed her first litter of kits, brought the light of their lives into the world: a lilac ticked tabby she-kit, a solid chocolate tom kit, and a solid fawn she-kit — brinekit, buzzardkit, and daisykit, respectively. they were the perfect family, everyone'd said so... and then you and your littermates had to come along and ruin everything.
you fail when you attempt to put what had happened between your mother and step-father into words because... well, because you just didn't know. you'd had no clue what had driven your mother into your father's paws — his charisma, perhaps? — but whatever it was had resulted in three illegitimate kits to be born. you and your littermates had caused a lot of trouble on your birthing day — it had been difficult for your mother, nearly cost her her life. not only that, but it had halted your elder siblings warrior ceremonies by a day. the screeching from the nursery had caused adderclaw, your mother's best friend, to feth the medicine cat — something was terribly wrong.
you emerged feet first — no one can explain how — and it had become a race against time to get you out of your mother's womb before before you suffocated. beaverclaw — who thought he'd fathered this litter as well — had been pacing in front of the nursery in a panic, desperate to know what was going on. between keeping him out of the nursery and urging the medicine cat to work faster, adderclaw had practically been losing her mind. on your mother's final push to send you into this world, you'd been silent. your mother, weak from exhaustion, could barely lift her head so that she could help you. adderclaw took it upon herself to groom you, her movements harsh and feverish as she did everything in her power to make you cry...
and you'd screamed, yowled to the high heavens as you writhed underneath adderclaw's harsh tongue. you'd shown who you would be early on, a feisty little devil who was not to be toyed with. you most definitely were the largest of the litter, certainly the most violent. you would come to believe that everything could be settled with tooth and claw, attack first and ask questions later would become your motto. you would become outspoken, always the one who demanded their voice to be heard, and wouldn't be above putting others down with your harsh words and sharp tongue. kind words would be reserved for kin and no one else.
your littermates entered the world far easier than yourself, pheasantkit being the second. everyone expected her to grow out of her shell as she got older, yet she would prove them wrong by remaining this shy little thing. she was practically attached at the hip to one of her littermates at all times — they were her anchors, her safety net. she wouldn't be able to cope without them as they became apprentices, wouldn't be able to handle the pressure of not being good enough for her mentor. in an effort to prove herself, this little life would be cut short.
rook-kit came into the world screeching in such a high voice. everyone knew who he would become right away — the life of the party. he would be overtly charismatic, convincing others to do his bidding while he lay back and watched events unfold. he was the culprit behind a lot of drama that went on within the clan — he made life fun.
batkit came into the world much like his brother, screaming his lungs out and batting at everything in his way. he was a fierce little thing whose bite would become just as painful as his words. passionate. aggressive. blunt. he would be loyal to a fault, would fight as though his life depended on it, and would love just as fiercely.
dimstar herself only allowed a select few to visit your mother and her newborns — the medicine cat, adderclaw, and your birth father among them. this factor alone led to the unavoidable hell that would be let loose upon the clan.
your fierce nature didn't die down one second that you were out of your mother's belly. you demanded the best spot while feeding, shoving your littermates out of the way and whining to your mother when they didn't move. you developed quicker than them, for your eyes opened up much earlier than your littermates. you were a unique case, determined to get the best out of life early on. dimstar lifted her rule on visiting the nursery after three days — she'd figured your mother had finally regained her full strength. you believe she'd only allowed spiderfang to visit because, intuitive as she was, she knew he had been the true father and that when the truth would come out, everything would go to hell.
you doubt she knew how dark the situation would turn, how quickly everything would fall apart, until it happened directly before her very eyes.
days after dimstar had lifted her rule, beaverclaw popped in for a visit... and regretted it dearly. he'd gazed down at the newest additiont to his family, at the kits that looked nothing like him, and he knew. you barely remember their conversation — great starclan, you were so young — and yet you remember them arguing, remember your mother yowling beaverclaw's name as he raced out of the nursery in search of spiderfang.
a fight ensued between the two toms and the warmth of your mother left you and your littermates as she raced out of the nursery in an attempt to stop the fight. in the blink of an eyes, with the mere flash of claws and fangs, both toms had sustained life-threatening injuries and bled to death in the middle of the camp, your mother yowling their names, cursing herself for the tragedy she had caused... and the anger she had brought down upon us.
you weren't the sweetest kit in the nursery. out of your littermates, you had to have been the most troublesome of them all. you would often pick fights with many of the older kits at the ripe age of two moons. you would win, but that never stopped you. if you could take them down with your tiny paws and needle-sharp teeth, you would use your words to tear down the walls of confidence they'd built to protect themselves. you were the bully of the bunch — those that weren't family were your enemies.
your brothers weren't exactly the gentlemanly sort of kits, either. you never really got along with the other kits — your rough play ran them off to their mothers and you were all cut off from the other kits of the nursery. your mother had no idea how to control you, did everything in her power to change your cruel ways, but nothing worked. trouble seemed to follow you no matter where you went — the nursery had been no exception.
your mother's affair with your father was no secret. at the age of five moons, one kit took it upon herself to open her big fat trout mouth about the situation, bringing up the memories of his death and who had killed him. "where's your father, hawthornkit?" it was a taunt, a jab at you because she knew exactly where your father was. you hated her for that question, hated that she could tease you about losing your father so easily, and took your anger out on her.
harsh words were your forte, more or less, but a fight between yourself and that kit had been bound to happen. you pounced on her without taking into regard the consequences that would follow... or not. once the fight had been broken up, you were rather surprised dimstar had not pushed your apprentice ceremony back a moon. she did, however, tell you that if another incident like that happened again, she would push your apprentice ceremony back indefinitely. that was enough to push you into ignoring whatever the other kits said.
perhaps that was when your mother realized she could never control you. in your heart, your blamed her for everything bad that had happened in your short life... and everything that had yet to come.
✯ ✯ ✯ ✯
the transition from kit to apprentice came naturally. you were already a cocky little shit, thought you knew everything there was to know — auburnflame deemed you were in for a rude awakening. she was training you to become the best of the best, and that's exactly what you became. when you finally did find time for yourself, you were never really alone. between pheasantpaw and auburnflame, you were always busy.
two moons in, while out training with auburnflame, you'd slipped away from her when she wasn't looking. you allowed your paws to guide you, taking you to a place your mentor had yet to bring you — the thunderclan border. the scent that hit you was strong, caused you to stop dead in your tracks. it was here you met bitternpaw, a large spotted tom with eyes the color of emeralds.
the two of you were hostile on the spot but, after a couple of heartbeats, the tension disappeared to be replaced with curiosity. the two of you began to talk about anything... everything... until auburnflame stumbled upon you. she pulled you away from the border and scolded you for entertaining the thunderclan apprentice. you were to care for the elders until further notice, but you didn't mind too much — the elders were avid storytellers and most were welcoming.
you couldn't get the handsome thunderclan apprentice out of your head, though... and so you met again. and again. and again. you were falling hard for the spotted tom with fire in his eyes.
and then his sister, burnetpaw, sent your world spinning.
she stumbled upon the two of you, so closely wrapped around one another that she couldn't tell where her brother ended and his love began. and when she finally could decipher one from the other, she grabbed hold of bitternpaw's tail and yanked him away from you. not one to be pushed around so easily, you leaped at burnetpaw. the two of you matched one another blow for blow, though it was obvious you would be victorious.
bitternpaw, however, would not stand aside and watch his sister get torn apart by the cat he loved. he stood between the both of you, effectively ending the fight because neither of you wanted to accidentally swipe at bitternpaw, and burnetpaw snarled at you to leave. unwilling to wasted any more time arguing with bitternpaw's hot-headed sister, you turned tail and fled back to camp. this decision, however, did not stop your heart from breaking as bitternpaw called after you in vain.
it was pheasantpaw, rookpaw, and batpaw who stood beside you to pick up the pieces.
it was in your ninth moon that you showed you were a force to be reckoned with. pheasantpaw's mentor, hailfang, was one cat you could definitely admit feeling hatred twoards. pheasantpaw was an excellent hunter, better than yourself, but her skills in combat were piss poor. hailfang would put her down because of this, would tell her she would never amount to much if she couldn't even fight to defend her clan. resisting the urge to claw the tom's eyes out, you often used your alone time to help pheasantpaw improve her battle techniques. but it still wasn't good enough; it was never good enough.
pheasantpaw would often be seen sulking around camp, looking rather dejected and angry at herself after training. you would try to spend time with her in order to lift her spirits, but the once clingy she-cat only pushed you, her closest sibling, away. and despite the love your littermates held for pheasantpaw, they were all secretly relieved that they didn't have to deal with the clingy she-cat any longer. you should've known something was wrong, should've alerted your mother or the medicine cat or someone, but you never thought the issue would escalate to what it did.
you woke one morning to find that pheasantpaw's nest was empty. cold. you alerted your mother right away, who in turn alerted dimstar. she formed a search party for the young molly and, much to your mother's disagreement, you wormed your way into the patrol. pheasantpaw's scent led you to the gorge, but she was no where to be found. they searched high and low but found no sign of the molly — shy, insecure pheasantpaw was gone.
you were too busy wallowing in self guilt to speak on the issue with your mother — that should've been the first sign of the chaos that would ensue. upon entering riverclan camp, you made a beeline for hailfang — this was all his fault. no one was expecting the attack, especially not hailfang himself, and he was taken by surprise as you knocked him off his paws. you were furious; grief stricken. it took your mother, auburnflame and dimstar herself to pull you away from the tom. you screamed to the heavens, cursed the tom's name, all the while being hauled away.
hailfang's wounds weren't fatal, but they were deep — they would most definitely leave scars, reminders that one doesn't wrong you or your family and get away with it.
hailfang steered clear of you after that -- feeling your claws once was all he needed to know how deep your hatred for him ran. the first few days of grieving were tumultuous, lashing out one minute and wailing the next. the only one able to take your mood swings in stride and without question was the one who brought you into this world — your mother.
it was then that any anger you held towards her dissipated.
a moon goes by, and tragedy strikes the clan. a skirmish over sunning rocks results in the death of two well-respected clan mates — the deputy, looncall, and your beloved mother. two major losses in less than two moons — you are uncertain if your heart can take any more loss.
you throw yourself into your training, despite your littermate's worries. you sparred with your fellow den mates, hunted whenever possible, helped around camp... anything to keep your mind off of pheasantpaw and your mother. when you collapsed from exhaustion, that's when everyone realized how largely these deaths affected you.
the leader felt it best for your warrior ceremony to be put on hold until further notice and, for once in your rebellious life, you didn't protest. and two moons later, while your littermates received their warrior names — rookstorm and batfang — you remained an apprentice in order to better your mental health and return to normal. to this day, you are incredibly thankful to auburnflame for not allowing you to wallow in your own guilt and grief for your extra moons as an apprentice.
✯ ✯ ✯ ✯
fourteen moons old and dimstar finally grants you with your warrior name: hawthornsnake. the moons pass peacefully, with you fulfilling you duties like any good warrior. and even though you are quite young, you are a well-respected member of the clan.
six moons later, you fall pregnant. your brothers, overprotective as always, were furious — who on earth had been brazen enough to lay their paws on you? you, on the other paw? you were frightened, really. you knew the tom who had gotten you pregnant (an elder warrior known as daceclaw) would most likely want nothing to do with these kits.
and then she came into the world, loud and kicking. she was the spitting image of her father, with her blue ticked coat. asterkit was to be her name - and you loved her dearly. you had always thought bitternclaw would've been the one to have your heart, but you'd been wrong. gazing down at the little she-kit you had brought into the world, it became quite clear that your heart belonged to her, always and forever.
there was never a dull moment with asterkit around. she marched to her own beat, made her own rules, and was quite content with giving her mother a near heart attack every chance she got. there were numerous visits to yellowstrike* — everything from torn claws to sprained paws. they were such regulars that he would often just shake his head and mutter "not again." when you entered the den.
and then batfang fell under the claws of thunderclan warriors. his death took a toll on you, pushed you into a darker state of mind. having him snatched away from you made you feel utterly alone. but you weren't — rookstorm and asterkit were constant reminders of that.
with their support, you pushed through your grief and enjoyed your time with your daughter before she was apprenticed. and six moons later, when that day came, your eyes shone with pride and joy and you couldn't help but feel that her mentor needed a word of warning — her wild and rambunctious nature was difficult to contain. asterpaw's mentor would have an eventful time with the energetic young molly.
and then everything began to fall apart.
✯ ✯ ✯ ✯
dimstar placed a hot-headed yom known as otterpaw under your wing. you did the best you could as a mentor, the pair of you forging a strong bond right from the start.
everything sort of spiraled after that.
you had never had a close bond with your half-siblings and you looked to change that. with littermates dropping like flies, you were looking to get closer to your estranged half-siblings. and so, with this in mind, you and buzzardwing* ventured out for an evening stroll. it was long before snarls reached the pairs ears and the scent of badger had both cats' fur sticking on end. every cell in your body screamed when you came across the cat against the badger — your half-sister, daisyflower*. she was down but most definitely not out. she was bleeding profusely from a gash in her side, but her teeth were still bared and she swiped at the stinking animal when it neared her — she refused to go down without a fight. a heartbeat was all it took for you to leap into the fray. you were quick on your feet, darting in and landing a few blows before using the strength in your back legs to push yourself away from the animal. buzzardwing, on the other paw, was torn between running for help and staying to protect the she-cats. he chose the latter.
and it cost him his life.
he fought valiantly, but one swipe from the beast was all it took. you heard his spine snap and screamed his name at the top of your lungs, rage and grief coursing through your veins. you knew the odds were against you, but you would not leave daisyflower when there was still breath in your body to fight. you stood protectively in front of daisyflower, who urged you to run while you still could, and snarled a warning at the badger as it ambled closer. you were ready for an attack... but it never came. the large creature turned tail and ran. to this very day, you can not explain why.
draping a wounded daisyflower across your back, you left a motionless buzzardwing behind you. two warriors fetched your half-brother's body and you mourned his loss alongside your half-sister, brinefrost*. shortly after, despite yellowstrike's best efforts, daisyflower succumbed to her wounds. only asterpaw, rookstorm, and yourself remained.
you and rookstorm were as close as two siblings could be, barely leaving one another's side. you drew strength from your littermate and a pawful of warriors found their relationship odd, thinking that the two of you were in love with one another. the mere suggestion made you sick to your stomach — was it so wrong to cling to the only sibling you had left?
but rookstorm began to change and you were the first to notice. he was restless, irritable, and barely spent any time with you. curious and worried, you followed your brother one night — right into twolegplace. he met up with three burly toms. you had no clue what they were discussing, but their quiet murmurs soon turned into a heated argument. rookstorm's shoulders slumped in defeat and he turned his back on the toms, no doubt ready to return to camp... it was the biggest mistake he'd ever made.
the toms jumped rookstorm and you didn't hesitate to break your cover by charging at the nearest tom and dragging him off of your brother. as you went in to drag another off of him, a small blur passed your vision and went crashing into one of the toms — it was otterpaw!
as your apprentice scrapped with one and you scrapped with another, rookstorm was struggling with the one atop him. the next events happened so fast that it became a blur in your mind, but you would never forget it. you had ripped your opponent's throat out and leaped at the tom atop your brother, sending him flying and leaving him stunned. your brother was barely moving, barely breathing, but you had no time to assess his injuries.
otterpaw had become overwhelmed by his opponent and as soon as you raced to aid your apprentice, otterpaw's throat was sliced right before your very eyes. your world crashed around you, losing both your apprentice and brother in one fell swoop. the two toms began to head towards your exhausted and devastated form, but by the grace of starclan a patrol came crashing into the twolegplace.
you spent two moons healing in gorsepelt's* den, despite arguing with marigoldstar about the fact that you were fine. during your healing period, asterpaw became astergrace and you fell into a bout of depression. you blamed yourself for not being quick enough to save two of the most important cats in your life.
✯ ✯ ✯ ✯
four moons later, dimstar succumbed to an unknown illness. the clan was devastated at losing their leader, yet they anticipated lionfire's reign. when the former deputy came back as lionstar, it surprised everyone when she named you as her deputy. the clan was divided between agreeing with her decision or not — you'd been through so much, were you really prepared for such responsibilities?
your daughter became your anchor, giving you the strength you needed to be the best deputy you could be. but she, too, disappeared from your life — vanished in the blink of an eyes. she was searched for, of course, but the evidence only crushed your hopes of finding the young she-cat — streaks of her blood splattered the ground and patches of fur were strewn about. the clan mourned the loss of the young warrior, but you mourned the loss of something far greater...
your heart.
dimstar — riverclan's leader for countless moons. the only leader hawthornsnake knew growing up. named lionfire as her [final] deputy.
yellowstrike — gorsepelt became his apprentice a moon before he was to become a warrior. stepped down from being a medicine cat and returned to regular warrior duties.
gorsepelt — initially began his training to become a warrior. became yellowstrike's apprentice a moon before his warrior ceremony. became medicine cat after yellowstrike stepped down. succumbed to greencough nearly twelve moons ago, leaving sparrowflight as riverclan's medicine cat.
buzzardwing — half-brother of hawthornsnake and her littermates. cared little for them, although did attempt to build a relationship with hawthornsnake shortly before he died.
daisyflower — half-sister of hawthornsnake and her littermates. a kind soul and always offered a smile. indifferent towards her half-siblings; never attempted to build a relationship with any of them.
brinefrost — half-sister of hawthornsnake and her littermates. resting bitch face is her. she is an asshole, absolutely loathes hawthornsnake and blames the molly and her littermates for the tragedy that befell their family.
[attr="class","appNAMEREASON"]
| PREFIX; named for her reddish-brown coat | SUFFIX; given to her for her stealth |
[attr="class","appOOC"]
| @rose | |
| twenty-two | she|her |
| central standard time | pm or discord |
[attr="class","appOOCfield"]bitternclaw, burnetfang, astergrace, and brinefrost will all be available for adoption. tagging Blithe to check over the application since it's for a high position. | |
